Former Libertarian Alabama gubernatorial candidate Loretta Nall, who made headlines because her boobs gave a columnist at the Montgomery Independent, Bob Ingram, the vapors (see my post "Boobage and the governor's race in Alabama") has a new and different campaign going on.
She's caught on to a story of another man down there with the vapors, attorney general Troy King, who is appalled that the state's anti-obscenity laws are vague — so vague that they haven't been able to shut the doors of sex toys stores in the state. The background, from the Birmingham News:
Alabama Attorney General Troy King might ask the Legislature to amend the state's anti-obscenity law after a Jefferson County judge ruled this month that part of the law was too vague to force closure of a Hoover store that sells sexual devices.Loretta has launched an effort on her blog to help AG Troy out.…[Circuit Judge Robert] Vance Jr.] ruled against the city of Hoover's contention that the Love Stuff store violated a state law prohibiting an "adult-only enterprise" from operating within 1,000 feet of homes, churches, schools, day care centers or other places "frequented by minors."
Vance ruled the law was too vague to enforce because it did not define "adult-only enterprise."
"While Love Stuff clearly sells a number of items that are for adults only, this Court lacks any standards to decide whether it is an `adult-only enterprise,'" wrote Vance, who spent an hour inspecting the store.
Along with the sexual devices and sexually explicit videos, books and magazines, the store also sells costumes, shoes, lingerie and other items. Anyone can enter the store, but the most explicit items are kept in an area restricted to those 18 and older. The restricted area amounted to about 26 to 29 percent of the floor space and about 32 to 36 percent of the inventory value, according to trial testimony.
Now, I only have six words to say to AG King about his anti-dildo crusade..FROM MY COLD DEAD FINGERS TROY!!!Check out Loretta's site for "campaign" information.I think that Troy may not have any experience with devices used in sexual pleasure, so, I am starting a crusade to introduce Troy King to the fabulous world of ben-wa balls, rubber weiners and pocket tooties. I want to encourage all of my readers to purchase a sex toy of some sort and send it to Alabama Attorney General Troy King. I also think there is something fundamentally wrong with a grown, college educated, elected official who seems to obsess over what other consenting adults in his home state might be using in the privacy of their bedrooms. I mean…don't we have much more serious problems in Alabama that our Attorney General should address?
44 Responses to “Sex Toys for Troy King campaign”
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“Troy King” sounds like a perfect porn star name.
What’s the betting that this guy has a whole stash of questionable items in a box in his closet?
Do I hear twenty dollars? Thirty? I’ll start a pool.
Is this limited to Troy King? Why not a “Dildos for Dildos” campaign?
to steal a line from the great molly ivins, if he loses any more IQ points someone while have to water him twice a day!
go loretta!
Troy King sounds like a gay pornstar name to me! Maybe the papers and news media should stop printing and saying it because it conjures certain adult activities.
Wouldn’t you send a trojan to a Troy King?
Thanks Y’all.
The Mobile Press Register did a front page news story on
the sex toy drive today. Newsflash just picked it up too. Whenever they have gotten my stories in the past things get crazy. It’ll be national by tomorrow…maybe even the end of today.
Normally I’m not enamoured of Libertarians . .
What’s the betting that this guy isn’t using rubber (or plastic or silicone) wieners?
Pocket tooties.
Ahhhh that’s just beautiful. That phrase will stay with me forever.
When dildos are outlawed only outlaws will have dildos.
“When dildos are outlawed only outlaws will have dildos.”
The people trying to outlaw them ARE dildos…
They wish.
They’ll have to pry my anatomically correct 8″ suction cup mount cyberskin dildo out of my cold, dead hands!
Oops, somebody already made that joke. That’s what I get for skimming instead of reading.
OH AH LOVES that Loretta! Not that I get all wild about libertarians, but if more were like her, I’d find them, well quite a bit more workable.
Go Loretta! Save Alabama!
They’ll have to pry my anatomically correct 8″ suction cup mount cyberskin dildo out of my cold, dead hands!
You’re using it wrong.
The people trying to outlaw them ARE dildos…
One thing is clear: they are stuck up asses!
“One thing is clear: they are stuck up asses!”
Are they wearing wetsuit(s) too?…
Someone needs an introduction to Jeff Stryker.
Again…after another shitty day…Pandagonians come through…I thank each and every one of you!
My own guess is that many men south of the Mason-Dixon line get all atwitter at the thought of any equipment being better formed and more satisfying than their own…
Mmmm, sex toys…
Usually “Libretarian” is code for gun-lovin’ nut-job racist asshole. But this lady absolutely rocks my world. I love her. Almost wish I could move to Alabama to vote for her. Well maybe not Alabama…
“pocket tooties”
WTF is a pocket tootie?
When you send Troy King a dildo, make sure it’s got a condom on it.
Safe sex, people! Safe sex!
Shall we take up a collection, and see if we get enough to send Troy a pair of wetsuits? For those times when ONE wetsuit, isn’t quite enough.
He probably already has the cuffs, so no need to send him those.
Really, what is left-blogistan but generous and helpful?
WTF is a pocket tootie?
Oh, thank God - I thought I was the only one who didn’t know…
One of my friends got another friend this for her birthday, leading to us greeting each other with “Helooooooo kitty” for the entire year.
Think the AG would like one? (They’re like $70 tho)
I intuited a pocket tootie was akin to a Fleshlight.
MAJeff: Nice moment of serendipity just now-
Just as I clicked on your link, I noticed that I still had a tab opened on something I was reading earlier today about WWII. So, next to that pic, I saw the tab headline: “Japanese Instrument of Surrender” and had a pretty comical double-take moment.
Heloooooooooo Kitty!
I give up!
I actually used that image to post this on my blog. I just love it. That and the audi-oh.
Normally I’m not enamoured of Libertarians . .
Although we may disagree with libertarians on many points, I think it is important to remember that there are certain issues on which we can come together.
Do recall that the term “libertarian” has been basically hijacked and more-often-than-not just means “intellectually arrogant rightwinger.” However, there are still regular, old libertarians out there, some of whom can even qualify as liberal or progressive. (I’m not one of them: government can do plenty of nifty things — it’s people that suck, imo.)
“Real” libertarians are great for slaughtering sacred cows though, especially on drug issues. They are a dying breed, is all.
Doesn’t help me, Hector. Would somebody please be a little more explicit? I don’t want to Google this stuff.
“Although we may disagree with libertarians on many points, I think it is important to remember that there are certain issues on which we can come together.”
*gigglesnort* Did you really mean that, considering the conversation and all?
We all know that it is the far-right wackos who are banning sex toys and porn. Banning certain material just because it is offensive is something that no progressive would ever do.
Cara: I would guess that a “pocket tootie” would be a hunk of plastic shaped like a vagina, the equivalent of a dildo for guys.
OMG!! MAJeff, I totally own the Hello Kitty “Massager”. I found it at the Hello Kitty store and bought it as a joke. I’ve never used it (I figure it can’t compare to The Rabbit.) But I bring it out at parties and we all have a good laugh at it. And for a year my best friend and I would greet each other with “Helloooo Kitty!” Spooky synchronicity!!
Has anyone tried this? I’ve thought about getting it for a couple friends, but right now that kind of gift is out of my price range.
Has anyone tried this? I’ve thought about getting it for a couple friends, but right now that kind of gift is out of my price range.
Wonderful. Soon the world will be full of women saying “I get off to Conway Twitty” - and meaning it.
Worse yet, Celine Dion.
Thank you.
A thing like that’s also called a “Fleshlight”? Huh.
If you missed yesterday’s editorial cartoon in the Mobile Press Register it’s a MUST SEE
Good Lord, people, I’m hopelessly naive. A rubber vagina you can carry in your pocket? Do they also have a fold-out wallet size? A vagina — er, Fleshlight — key-chain? Maybe one you can wear around your neck on a lanyard?
And can I use my PayPal account?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3lJWg3HXpHc
Writer, former Alabama resident mocks AG’s sex-toy stance via YouTube
By Dana Beyerle
Montgomery Bureau Chief
MONTGOMERY | With an Internet connection and a little YouTube know-how, anyone can ridicule a high-ranking public official.
Attorney General Troy King found that out Tuesday.
Alabama native and writer Steve Elliott, who now lives in Washington state, posted a video on site mocking King for defending a state law prohibiting sex toys in Alabama.
“That’s what I’m trying to do, make him look ridiculous, because that’s how he’s making the state of Alabama look,” Elliott said Tuesday.
The 30-second video is a montage that uses King’s singing “duet” with the late Johnny Cash as a soundtrack. The video includes an image of Cash making an offensive hand gesture.
The Mobile Press-Register reported Sunday that King created a CD last year in which he added his vocals to a little-known recording by Cash of the song “My Elusive Dreams,” which was never released. King distributed about 25 copies of his recording as a Christmas gift, the Press-Register reported.
Elliott said he was inspired to create the YouTube video after reading a blog written by one-time third-party gubernatorial candidate and marijuana advocate Loretta Nall, in which she described sending King an inflatable pig sex aid last year.
http://www.tuscaloosanews.com/article/20080109/NEWS/954425851/0/FRONTPAGE