I am ew my god I hate this word Bisexual. Because it doesn’t describe me at all.. Queer is a closer match, but still misses, and I can’t bring myself to say poly just yet because of my OWN hang ups :/ haha What would that make me then? I find myself attracted to androgenous women/men, transexuals, and queers of like mind. Body makes no difference to me as that’s not the first thing I look for..

No, I am not out to my family, (LDS Mormons) and I doubt very seriously I would or will ever come out to them. I have a hard enough time protecting and defending my girl’s sexuality choices to add mine to the coop. There was a simillar campaign at school in their LGBT ally community that encouraged them to come out. (who ever thought of that one in the middle of a blood red district needs to be smacked upside the head!) Half the kids have been transfered out or expelled, the other half have been demonized and brutalized in school, and both girls have to be driven back and forth to school because it’s now not safe for them to ride the bus.

Anyway, they came out to my parents and the ah ensuing battle occured where they are attempting to remove the kids from my custody and give them to their bigoted dad, who yeah let’s not go there….

Work? I haven’t seen work in 7 yrs. Since I filed a sexual harrassment suit against my last boss (that was summilarily dismissed due to no evidence)

Friends? nope don’t have any in real life and with the climate in my current living area, don’t want any. It’s too red for my blood! **grin** No, I am serious.. There is usually a daily beating and killing of people around these parts and last thing I want is someone to come after me.

Neighbors? Too isolated and constricting on beliefs to even open a door for a stranger to have any worries about the neighbors.

One thing that definately makes it very hard, is being in a solid commited relationship. He knows and is fully wanting to support me in my needs, but he isn’t ready for it really and i wouldn’t want to push that on him. I have been living in the closet for a very long time, not to say it doesn’t come out. It does, especially when a person catches my eye or my ear and i want to know their name. He loves me and I love him and I want to meet a girl who could round us out. But and that’s a BIG one. I put out wierd signals.

My bestfriend of 25 yrs has said she always thought I was the gay one when she was the androgenous one.. (completely het) But I didn’t believe her being so inducted into the religion. I left the religion about 12 yrs ago, When my X left me for .. (not saying) Anyway, Since the religion is still on the way out, (somethings I can’t stop, like following the “Golden Rule” and loving our enemies, even though that would get me killed. Its a work in progress. But EVERYONE knows I defend my LGBT friends even though I don’t have any. Well I did, but the couple were “his” friends and they took his side in the divorce and well yeah we know where that went.

I am for loving who you love, it’s not my buisness to be in your bedroom nor you be in mine unless your interested.. LOL So me and the girls talk openly about it, my older daughter has a girlfriend, and the younger daughter isn’t sure yet and that’s fine. She had a boyfriend, but apparently he wasn’t nice to her sister, so she told him to go suck an egg. LOL

I’m fairly certain that I’m bisexual, but not sure enough to “come out” so to say…

Assuming you do know that you are attracted to some men and some women, you can just say this. No need to choose the word “bisexual” if you aren’t sure it accurately describes you.

For my straight readers:
– are you “out” as an ally?
– are you able to talk about gay friends or relatives with others?
– are you comfortable shooting down homophobes when they spout off during a conversation?

yes, yes, and YES. (i love mixin’ it up with the idjits). i was lucky in that i grew up in a super-diverse area, so i was fully growned and very staunch in my convictions before i first came face-to-face with anti-gay bigotry. i could see where, if i had been in that situation at, say, 12, and not at 19, things would have been harder. but maybe not…i remember almost slugging it out with my grandpa over Bill Clinton, back in the day.

–Outspoken Straight Ally

Ally? Yes.

Talk? Well, sure.

Shooting dopey people? Well, no.

– are you “out” as an ally?

I don’t know. My few friends on this side of the continent are het, and I don’t have that many social contacts which aren’t over the internet. On the ‘net, I’m more likely to make decisions about a person based on their ability to spell correctly and punctuate accurately than on their preferences for sex. Their spelling and punctuation determines how readable their words are. Their sexuality doesn’t affect me unless they’re actually propositioning me directly.

– are you able to talk about gay friends or relatives with others?

I’d be fine with it. No gay relatives that I know of (there may well be someone out on the outer fringes of the extended family, but if there is, they’re likely keeping it vewy vewy quiet, since the majority of the rellies tend toward religious beliefs of some persuasion or another), and as I said, for most of my friends online, their sexuality isn’t really something that comes up in casual conversation.

My own take is that someone else’s sexuality is their business. It’s not mine unless they’re involving me. This goes double for a workplace, or a social group. Treble for neighbours (so long as they keep the noise down past midnight, it really doesn’t affect me!).

– are you comfortable shooting down homophobes when they spout off during a conversation?

Ah. Here you hit one of my buttons. I’m not comfortable with getting into a confrontation with anyone with extreme views - and this does include a lot of my family. My anger issues are manyfold and convoluted. Online, I’ll tend to point out that whichever views are being slurred around are probably inaccurate, and if I’m really pissed off, I’ll start asking for evidence. I haven’t yet got to the point where I’ll drop an encylopaedia length post with multiple references in response to a single troll, but sometimes I get close.

My own views on all of this are coloured by the following:

* I’m effectively asexual at present due to the medication I’m taking
* I’m Australian, living in Australia
* I’m afflicted with a form of social blindness which means I don’t notice people taking an interest in me sexually unless they hit me with it upside the head (and it appears to be hereditary - my mother apparently has the same thing).

– your immediate family?
Yup. Parents and brother.

– your extended family?
One of my mom’s sisters, and her kids. It’s working its way around the family; Thanksgiving should be interesting.

– any/some/most of your colleagues at work?
I’m not employed at the moment, unfortunately. I am a poor college student. My classmates mostly know; going to school with your girlfriend will do that.

– your boss?
No boss. My teachers know, some of them. I didn’t out and out tell them, but it’s a small campus and Sarah walks me to class on occasion.

– your doctors?
Yup. She’s pleased that she doesn’t have to give me the “don’t get pregnant by boys” anymore.

– your neighbors?
Mhm. One knew before my parents did. One asked me how my girlfriend was doing when I had no idea she knew. That was hilarious. I stared at her and said, “…she’s doing well.” What else could I say?

All in all, I’m happy. Sarah and I tend to be careful about physical affection.when we leave campus, because we’re in Ohio, but that’s life.

You know what? Dobson and Bennett probably don’t give a shit about these women - in their book, it is perfectly acceptable to use a woman to fix a man, even if it destroys or robs years of life from her.